Monday, November 19, 2007
Oh look-- // 5:08 PM
15/11/07
Went out with mom and sis. Sis wanted to get a skirt and shirt for a dinner that her company's going to hold. Must wear formal formal, and black is not allowed.
saw this in one of the shops. pretty nice..
then we went to eat. forgot what's the name called. the shop stated it's homemade. But the black pepper chicken is so oily and.. fattening :/
played with the things after eating.
oh, ya. the wall got show the things that they used to cook, i think. And then i saw this. KIDNEY. wah -_-
then we take bus to plaza sing`. and went to the big big This Fashion near plaza sing`.
nice yea? they are just models. my mom bought a shirt, and i could share it with her.
and blah, we went home when the shop closes.
That night, that night, you told me you would wait for me to get home to sleep.
I told you to sleep first, because you were tired. And there was bball training the following day.
You said you couldn't really get to sleep, because you feel something missing.
I'm glad, because i know you were meaning about me. I wasn't able to go to sleep with you that night.
But in the end, your tired-ness tire you out, and you fell asleep.
Right now, i begin to ponder. You felt that you were missing something. Is it really me? Or is it because you still misses your ex?
Ex. Such a short word, yet it affects me and drives me up the wall. Since you decide to break up with her, why can't you forget. Why can't you forget about her 'feel'?
I still remember so clearly, you said you'd take me to the gothic shop i told you about. I freaked out, feeling so happy. And then, sun morning, you asked me to find some people to go there with me.
By then, I really really didn't think so much.
But now, i know what you mean. You couldn't fulfil what you promised me.
Promises. They are meant to be broken in the very end.
The last time i saw you, it was on Monday.
So long, all you were occupied with, is bball.
I never complained, i never went to find you. Maybe that's where i was wrong. I should have went to find you.
I know i can't be with you everyday.
But i make the effort, to even wake up as early as you did, to say goodmorning to you, to tell you that i love you.
You always tell me to go back to sleep, to not wake up so early.
BUT I WANT TO. Mayb i think that's the best i can do, to support and be with you ever since you wake up. But no you don't think it that way. You thought i just wake up for fun?
And i'd never know if your ex does the same, waking up so early, but anyway, i don't care.
A few days ago, we were smiling to each other, hugging each other so tightly, telling each other the 3 words. And then as days pass, i can feel, the love from you lessens.
No i didn't dare to ask why. Until sun night, you told me everything. It's such a super sudden break up.
Cry. Oh who wouldn't?!
I once was so happy. So happy that deno and gina actually came back into my life again, and together with you, i wouldn't ask for more. But why, why do you leave...
Sadness that words cannot describe. I want to reply your smses, i still want to be your friend. But i cant get myself to type and send. Whenever i type finish, i would just press cancel, and not send it.
Thanks to penghwee, for those encouragments. I can't promise you i won't hurt myself. If i'm crazy when i saw a sharp object, i'd never know what i myself will do.
Thanks to Gina, for sms-ing me to comfort me.
Thanks to Deno, for saying you'll buy me something to drink, probably something that can make me go drunk, yea? Sorry i break your cig.
Thanks to everyone who cared. But no, i'm still emo-ing!
Maybe i'd hold on. I'd hurt myself for holding on. But i hope you'll one day realise how much you are to me, and come back. It may be a miracle, but... nevermind, i'll still hold on.
Until then, i'll stop here. Be back soon.
Labels: emo-ing again
